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Dear Miss Manners: Those of us working for ratification of the Equal Rights Amendment have been advised to take a “ladylike” approach. We tried emulating the behavior of our opposition, but this hardly seemed ladylike. Now we read your column aloud at our political strategy meetings, and while this has been most helpful, ERA is not yet ratified. Could you provide a precise political definition of “ladylike”?
Dear Reader: A lady is, above all, someone who is passionately concerned that others be treated with dignity, fairness and justice. It has always been considered ladylike, for instance, to fight for these things on behalf of children, animals and one’s husband.
The difficulty you are encountering on the subject is that many people do not consider it ladylike to fight that battle on one’s own behalf. Therefore, if a woman truly wishes to be ladylike, she will fight for dignity, fairness and justice, not for herself, but for all other women. Ratifying the Equal Rights Amendment is an excellent place to start.
I don’t care how you feel about friendship or magic literally everybody needs to watch this video right now
FINALLY SOMEBODY GETS IT
This is pretty much it, good video. In fact, this video talks about one of the major conflicts a lot of girls (like me!) have in adolescence: the concept of femininity is bogged down with so much social bullshit and systematic unfairness (and believe me, even as little kids we can tell) that lots of us feel we have to reject feminine things because we don’t want any of that crap. Even if we like it.
And I suspect, this goes for boys too. Because things associated with girls are also associated with that social bullshit, and they get constantly shamed by their peers to maintain their masculinity (The ‘Fag Discourse’, from C.J. Pascoe, this is an excerpt from a book I think all bronies should read) in adolescence, so they can’t easily take coded feminine things out of their dark hole either.
I would have felt way less ashamed of myself when I was a little kid if I had discourse like this to follow.
This video is spot on, and I encourage everyone to watch it, even if you’re not a pegasister or a brony.
Applause gif that I can’t dig up right now.
Yes, yes, yes. This is exactly why I fell in love with this show.
I WAS AFRAID I WAS GOIG TO GET MAD AT THIS VIDEO BUT HOLY CRAP IT WAS SO GOOD
I DON’T CARE IF YOU DON’T WATCH THE SHOW YOU SHOULD WATCH THIS :U
[he kept saying “feminity” instead of “femininity” though omg]
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Feminists do not want you to lose custody of your children. The assumption that women are naturally better caregivers is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not like commercials in which bumbling dads mess up the laundry and competent wives have to bustle in and fix it. The assumption that women are naturally better housekeepers is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to have to make alimony payments. Alimony is set up to combat the fact that women have been historically expected to prioritize domestic duties over professional goals, thus minimizing their earning potential if their “traditional” marriages end. The assumption that wives should make babies instead of money is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want anyone to get raped in prison. Permissiveness and jokes about prison rape are part of rape culture, which is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want anyone to be falsely accused of rape. False rape accusations discredit rape victims, which reinforces rape culture, which is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to be lonely and we do not hate “nice guys.” The idea that certain people are inherently more valuable than other people because of superficial physical attributes is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to have to pay for dinner. We want the opportunity to achieve financial success on par with men in any field we choose (and are qualified for), and the fact that we currently don’t is part of patriarchy. The idea that men should coddle and provide for women, and/or purchase their affections in romantic contexts, is condescending and damaging and part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to be maimed or killed in industrial accidents, or toil in coal mines while we do cushy secretarial work and various yarn-themed activities. The fact that women have long been shut out of dangerous industrial jobs (by men, by the way) is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to commit suicide. Any pressures and expectations that lower the quality of life of any gender are part of patriarchy. The fact that depression is characterized as an effeminate weakness, making men less likely to seek treatment, is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to be viewed with suspicion when you take your child to the park (men frequently insist that this is a serious issue, so I will take them at their word). The assumption that men are insatiable sexual animals, combined with the idea that it’s unnatural for men to care for children, is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to be drafted and then die in a war while we stay home and iron stuff. The idea that women are too weak to fight or too delicate to function in a military setting is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want women to escape prosecution on legitimate domestic violence charges, nor do we want men to be ridiculed for being raped or abused. The idea that women are naturally gentle and compliant and that victimhood is inherently feminine is part of patriarchy.
Feminists hate patriarchy. We do not hate you.
If you really care about those issues as passionately as you say you do, you should be thanking feminists, because feminism is a social movement actively dedicated to dismantling every single one of them. The fact that you blame feminists—your allies—for problems against which they have been struggling for decades suggests that supporting men isn’t nearly as important to you as resenting women. We care about your problems a lot. Could you try caring about ours?
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”She stands out on the red carpet because she does not smile broadly or pose; she usually looks slightly uncomfortable. Of her red-carpet experience,Stewart said:
People say that I’m miserable all the time. It’s not that I’m miserable, it’s just that somebody’s yelling at me…I literally, sometimes, have to keep myself from crying…It’s a physical reaction to the energy that’s thrown at you.”
“Stewart is often a target of a specific kind of body policing: the “smile, baby” requirement. When she appears on the red carpet and does not assure us with her teeth that she is simply thrilled to be reduced to a presence, a dress, a posture, she is often the target of harassment for her expression. There is an expectation of women in general and famous woman in particular to always assure the onlooker that they are happy to be looked upon through smiling, and Stewart rejects this.”
“Women are expected to be nice and sweet, to make other people feel comfortable. A woman who says ‘hey, I think there’s a problem here’ is being ‘negative.’ A woman who doesn’t smile while she’s being harassed is ‘humourless.’ A woman who prefers to stay focused on tasks is a ‘cold bitch.’ Significant gendering is involved here; women have an obligation to look and act a certain way and when they don’t, they need to be hassled until they do.”
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|—||Alt Text: Taking Another Look at the Myth of the ‘Nice Guy’ | Underwire | Wired.com (via bulletinaweave)|
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WOMEN: please wear high heels unless you don’t know how to walk in high heels in which case stay home and softly gnaw on bottles of shampoo
also please show no less than 64.87% of your boob and no more than 27.94%
stop having arms
when people ask you to smile, blowjob them
my tummy itches make that stop
i will think of new problems for you to have tomorrow
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“Fat” is usually the first insult a girl throws at another girl when she wants to hurt her
I mean, is ‘fat’ really the worst thing a human being can be? Is ‘fat’ worse than ‘vindictive’, ‘jealous’, ‘shallow’, ‘vain’, ‘boring’ or ‘cruel’? Not to me; but then, you might retort, what do I know about the pressure to be skinny? I’m not in the business of being judged on my looks, what with being a writer and earning my living by using my brain…
I went to the British Book Awards that evening. After the award ceremony I bumped into a woman I hadn’t seen for nearly three years. The first thing she said to me? ‘You’ve lost a lot of weight since the last time I saw you!’
‘Well,’ I said, slightly nonplussed, ‘the last time you saw me I’d just had a baby.’
What I felt like saying was, ‘I’ve produced my third child and my sixth novel since I last saw you. Aren’t either of those things more important, more interesting, than my size?’ But no – my waist looked smaller! Forget the kid and the book: finally, something to celebrate!
I’d rather they were independent, interesting, idealistic, kind, opinionated, original, funny – a thousand things, before ‘thin’. And frankly, I’d rather they didn’t give a gust of stinking chihuahua flatulence whether the woman standing next to them has fleshier knees than they do. Let my girls be Hermiones, rather than Pansy Parkinsons.
|—||J.K. Rowling (via alliegrace)|
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